For a while I've felt there was a vapidness to this account. I can't say that I don't enjoy creating and posting overtly sexual work, because I do. But even in the glamour and glitz of it all I am sometimes left feeling " But who really fucking cares!?". .
When I was pregnant I started a separate account from scratch to document my pregnancy. I never promoted or publicly mentioned it here because I wanted a fresh view and audience. And unlike when I started this page all those years ago, I knew exactly what I wanted to say. I wanted to tell my story. I wanted to expose myself and share my experience in a raw and vulnerable way. I wanted to inspire. I wanted to feel inspired and create something real.
I learned a lot during that time. I learned the power of story telling and the desire so many of us have to see something authentic on social media. I learned that the birth/mom community on IG is a fierce, highly emotional and magical AF world that I was proud to be part of. But most importantly I learned and was affirmed that my voice matters. As I poured out my soul post after post, true heart connection began to show up. And even though it was extremely scary being so vulnerable at times I learned that even a little IG account can be in service when its in flow with purpose.
For reasons not even completely clear to me I've stopped posting on that page. Maybe its because I got full blast back in to my Miss May money maker or maybe its because I finally got tired of the creeps and rude men shaming me. FYI: when a confident, sexy, I-don't-give-a-fuck, PREGNANT woman shows up on the scene a lot of people tend to not know how to deal.
Anyway, the point is, this page needs a facelift because I don't know how much longer I can keep this shit up. And the world needs my voice and my words just as much as it needs my ass. Because, well, I say so. We are all on a tipping point right now. The world is on a tipping point and I refuse to stand by and be fluff. So, to answer my own question " But who really fucking cares!?"......I DO. And regardless if anyone even reads the caption or if its on brand (eye roll), I plan to write again. ~Behind the white picket fence.
